Episode 74: Yes, We’re Still Bitter

This week’s episode starts off nicely enough. We talk about gearing up for our upcoming 30th anniversary trip, the improving weather after a week of extreme cold, and getting together with some old friends.

And then it all goes down hill.

First, we address an inaccurate comment on one of our posts — no, a majority of Americans did not, in fact, vote for Donald Trump. He didn’t even win a majority of the votes cast, and a good 90 million eligible voters stayed home

Then, of course, we have to address Trump and Musk taking a wrecking ball to America, their illegal “budget cuts” — not really budget cuts; more like illegally diverting money our elected representatives allocated to government programs — and the downside of our decades long obsession with STEM. 

And we have a lot more to say about all that!

In addition to the audio podcast you can find here, you can watch a video version of this episode (and future episodes!) on our YouTube channel and on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave).

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to leave us a comment, and we’ll talk again soon. 

Episode 73: Bon Foster Civil Rights Celebration

What do you do when the world has gone mad and American democracy seems to be collapsing right in front of you? One thing you can do is to find the thing that matters most to you and dedicate yourself to that cause. It might be diversity, equity and inclusion. It might be climate change. It might be economic justice. But find that one thing and focus your efforts and your energy on it, because no one of us can solve all the world’s problems.

That’s why we continue to be involved in Lambda Legal, one of the country’s oldest and most successful LGBTQIA+ civil rights and advocacy groups. For 51 years, Lambda Legal has fought for and secured the rights of LGBTQIA+ people and people living with HIV, and they are more dedicated to that fight than ever before.

So, as we discuss on this week’s episode, we ask you to join us for (or, at the very least, contribute to) Lambda Legal Midwest Region’s major annual event: the Bon Foster Civil Rights Celebration, which takes place on Friday, May 9, 2025, at 6:30 p.m. Central time at the Art Institute of Chicago. You can buy tickets for the event here, or, if you’re not able to make it, you can donate here. We’ve got our tickets, and we hope to see you there!

There’s more to this week’s episode, too, including other ways to maintain your sanity in these crazy times, our Valentine’s celebration, and ways to stay connected with friends and family, which is incredibly important right now.

In addition to the audio podcast you can find here, you can watch a video version of this episode (and future episodes!) on our YouTube channel and on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave).

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to leave us a comment, and we’ll talk again soon. 

Episode 72: Understanding Our Transgender Friends and Family

Inspired, in part, by the new Amazon Prime series Clean Slate starring George Wallace, Laverne Cox, and Telma Hopkins, we take a different approach to this week’s show: We talk directly to those of you who may be confused about transgender people, who are both increasingly visible and increasingly under attack these days. We understand that many of you — many of us — grew up without learning or being taught accurate information about sex, gender, and sexual identity, and so many of us labor under misconceptions about our transgender friends, family members, and neighbors. But that can change if we approach these subjects in good faith, with an open mind, and an acceptance of our shared humanity.

So, with that in mind, we consider some common questions that we think many people are unclear about:

  • What does it mean to be transgender?
  • According to science, aren’t there only two genders and two sexes? For some background information that may be helpful, please read this Scientific American article
  • Isn’t this a “new” thing? How come I never heard of transgender people before?
  • Hasn’t the number of kids identifying as transgender exploded in recent years? Aren’t adults “indoctrinating” them?
  • What about kids getting gender affirming care? Isn’t that dangerous and won’t they regret permanent or life-altering treatment? This article in Mother Jones provides some useful statistical information. 
  • Isn’t it unfair to allow transgender athletes to compete in girls’/women’s sports?

Please listen to our answers to these questions. We think they may help people are confused and don’t know what to think. And, if you are interested, please watch this interview with George Wallace an Telma Hopkins on Clean Slate.

In addition to the audio podcast you can find here, you can watch a video version of this episode (and future episodes!) on our YouTube channel and on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave).

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to leave us a comment, and we’ll talk again soon. 

Episode 70: Airing of Grievances

We got a lot of problems with you people. Well, maybe not you people, but … some people.

In this episode, we talk about the chaos that followed Monday’s inauguration and the never-ending stream of outrages coming from the new administration. In no particular order, we talk about Trump attacking transgender people, rescinding a 60-year-old executive order on race discrimination, raising tariffs, and gutting the federal government; Bishop Budde’s sermon and the rightwing reaction to it; Elon Musk’s unmistakable Nazi salute … and a whole lot more.

We also revisit the discussion of the Equal Rights Amendment that we began last week, and we’re less optimistic than we might have been.

Finally, with Holocaust Remembrance Day on Monday, we talk about the importance of speaking up, how ordinary people have answered the call in times of crisis, and how we should be those people today.

In addition to the audio podcast you can find here, you can watch a video version of this episode (and future episodes!) on our YouTube channel and on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave).

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to leave us a comment, and we’ll talk again soon. 

Episode 64: Come for the Christmas Shopping, Stay for the Polio

On this week’s episode, we talk about Christmas coming up fast, Black Friday, and transitioning from shopping in malls to shopping online.

And then we turn to America’s recurring nightmare, because we can’t help ourselves.

First up: The incoming president nominating Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. to be Secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services. We used to point and laugh and crazy anti-vaccine conspiracy theorists. Now one is about to run the department that basically oversees healthcare in America.

We then have a very frank conversation about the threat RFK, Jr. poses to mental health treatment in America, which could, like his opposition to vaccines, have deadly consequences.

Finally, we talk at length about this week’s oral arguments before the US Supreme Court in United States v. Skrmetti, a case in which the federal government and a number of private plaintiffs are challenging Tennessee’s outright ban on gender-affirming care for transgender youth. While the outcome of the case is far from certain, the lawyers for the US and the private plaintiffs — US Solicitor General Elizabeth Prelogar and ACLU attorney Chase Strangio (the first transgender lawyer to argue before the Supreme Court) — were just fantastic. Please listen to this extended discussion of a very important topic, and check out this excellent piece by Chris Geidner on the Skrmetti arguments. 

You can also listen to a recording or download a transcript of the oral arguments on the Supreme Court’s website.

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave), and we’ll talk again soon.

Episode 63: ’Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

On this week’s episode, we begin with the story of how we met on November 23, 1993, the night before Thanksgiving. We did it the old fashioned way: In a bar, forced to have an awkward conversation by well-intentioned friends. And here we are, 31 years later!

We also talk about Rep. Nancy Mace’s Michael-Richards-style meltdown over Rep.-elect Sarah McBride, who will be the first transgender member of Congress, and the Republican Party’s obsession with other people’s genitals. As Philadelphia Inquirer columnist Will Bunch pointed out last week, this is perhaps the first major moral crisis of Trump II. Long story short: we need more people, including more Democratic politicians, to speak up for Rep. McBride and the broader LGBTQIA community.

To hear more, you’ll have to listen in … but do yourself a favor and read Will Bunch’s column. It’s very good.

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave), and we’ll talk again soon.

Episode 62: The Election, Part 2

This one actually required two takes because somebody had a hard time coping on our first attempt to record it …

Anyway, this episode focuses on the outcome of the election (as compared to last episode, recorded on election night, where we still felt some measure of hope). We talk about the consequences of the election, the impact on our mental health, and the need to vent a little. We also talk about making connections and staying connected to good people who are making the world a better place, which is more important now than ever.

And, respectfully, to all the politicians giving us their hot takes on what just happened: Please be quiet. You should be listening, not talking.

Other topics we cover include the future of education under the incoming administration, Trump’s political corruption, the (very!) slim margin of his victory, the value of immigration, and much, much more.

So stay connected, be you, be out, be loud, and don’t give up! 

We hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave), and we’ll talk again soon.

Episode 59: More on Will & Harper

After talking about our Saturday morning walk (or hike, as Jennifer called it) and Illinois’ 21-7 victory over Michigan, we continue our conversation about the Netflix documentary, Will & Harper, featuring Will Ferrell and Harper Steele. We talk about the challenges of coming out late in life, the importance of having support from family and longtime friends, and dealing with the inevitable haters.

But you’ll have to listen in to find out more!

So, we hope you enjoy the show, please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave), and we’ll talk to you soon.

Episode 48: Civil Rights Galas, College Graduations, Kind Words, and Bruce in Ireland

In this week’s episode, we talk about Lambda Legal’s Bon Foster Civil Rights Celebration at the Art Institute of Chicago, for which Dave is on the host committee. It’s not too late to make a donation to this fantastic organization, which has been fighting for LGBTQIA+ rights for more than 50 years. 

Then, Jennifer gives a recap of her fun but very hectic trip to San Antonio last weekend, we talk about our youngest’s college graduation this weekend, and the importance of sharing kind and supportive words … even if it doesn’t come naturally to some of us!

Finally, we spend some time talking about our upcoming trip to Ireland to see Bruce Springsteen (again!), Bruce’s European tour opener in Cardiff, and his (first ever?) performance in Belfast, a city that could use a lot of love.

We hope you enjoy the show, and please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave). You can also follow us on the site formerly known as Twitter, where our joint account is @JennandDave1 and the podcast account is @itsotetPodcast. Until next time

Episode 42: Channeling Difficult Emotions

Since we rebooted our podcast, we begin this week’s show discussing topics we plan to cover going forward, including familiar themes such as LGBTQIA+ rights, family, and music, and new(ish) themes like cooking and physical and mental health.

From there, we discuss the tragic death of indigenous nonbinary teenager Nex Benedict after a brutal attack at a high school in Oklahoma, and the range of emotions their death evokes: anger, rage, frustration, despair. But, more importantly, we talk about how to channel those emotions in a constructive and positive way, because losing hope is not an option.

To that end, we also talk about an important fundraising project we are involved in: the annual Lambda Legal Bon Foster Civil Rights Celebration in Chicago, which takes place on Friday, May 10, at 6:30 p.m. Central at the Art Institute. Please consider joining us if you can, and, if that’s not possible, please consider making a donation to Lambda Legal, one of the country’s oldest, largest, and most successful legal organizations fighting for LGBTQIA+ Americans and people living with HIV.

Above all, to paraphrase the late, great Joe Strummer of the Clash, we urge everyone who’s feeling justifiable anger today to turn that anger into power.

So, we hope you enjoy the show, and please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave). You can also follow us on the site formerly known as Twitter. Our joint account is @JennandDave1 and the podcast account is @itsotetPodcast. Until next time!