Author: jennanddavevonebers

Married couple in the Chicago area in a mixed orientation relationship.
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Episode 42: Channeling Difficult Emotions

Since we rebooted our podcast, we begin this week’s show discussing topics we plan to cover going forward, including familiar themes such as LGBTQIA+ rights, family, and music, and new(ish) themes like cooking and physical and mental health.

From there, we discuss the tragic death of indigenous nonbinary teenager Nex Benedict after a brutal attack at a high school in Oklahoma, and the range of emotions their death evokes: anger, rage, frustration, despair. But, more importantly, we talk about how to channel those emotions in a constructive and positive way, because losing hope is not an option.

To that end, we also talk about an important fundraising project we are involved in: the annual Lambda Legal Bon Foster Civil Rights Celebration in Chicago, which takes place on Friday, May 10, at 6:30 p.m. Central at the Art Institute. Please consider joining us if you can, and, if that’s not possible, please consider making a donation to Lambda Legal, one of the country’s oldest, largest, and most successful legal organizations fighting for LGBTQIA+ Americans and people living with HIV.

Above all, to paraphrase the late, great Joe Strummer of the Clash, we urge everyone who’s feeling justifiable anger today to turn that anger into power.

So, we hope you enjoy the show, and please feel free to follow us on Instagram (@jenn_and_dave). You can also follow us on the site formerly known as Twitter. Our joint account is @JennandDave1 and the podcast account is @itsotetPodcast. Until next time! 

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Episode 41: The Reboot!

Yes, it’s been awhile since we posted our last episode on October 1, 2023. We’ve had a lot going on since then (mostly, the holidays) and we’ve given a lot of thought to whether we should continue the podcast, due in part to some of the flak we get online. But, in the end, we decided that we’re not going to let the haters dictate what we do and say.

So, we’re back. And this time we mean it.

Anyway, in this episode we talk about dealing with abuse on social media without losing your sanity. We’re not policing anybody’s posts, but sometimes the best thing to do is to simply not engage. You can mute the abusers, block them, or simply ignore their comments and get on with your life, but there’s no real upside to fighting with them. Post whatever you want, but consider what’s the sanest and best approach to dealing with people who get bent out of shape — because no matter what you post, it’s pretty much guaranteed that somebody’s going to get bent out of shape about it.

On a lighter note, we also talk about traveling back to Ireland (our third trip in three years) to see Bruce Springsteen again (for the second time in two years). Last year, you may recall, we split our time between Dublin and Sligo; this year we’re splitting our time between Dublin and Cork, Ireland’s second largest city. Should be a great trip!

So, we hope you enjoy the show, and please feel free to follow us on the site formerly known as Twitter. Our joint account is @JennandDave1 and the podcast account is @itsotetPodcast. Until next time! 

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Episode 40: New Cars and New Jobs … Part Two

Hey, we made it to forty episodes! (In, like, a year and a half. But still.)

Anyway, in this week’s episode: when you podcast it, it comes true. Last episode we talked about getting a new car and Jennifer getting a new job. This week, both of those things happened.

We also talk about public transportation, the upcoming Garland Jeffreys documentary, Garland Jeffreys: The King of In Between, the return of summer and the last pool weekend of the season, vacationing in the Bahamas, Illinois football and the upcoming Homecoming game, bad sports fans, and … winter is coming.

So please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast and @JennandDave1.

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Episode 39: New Cars and New Jobs

In this week’s episode: An update on the firing of Kris Martin, a local teacher whom the Homer Glen, Illinois, school board let go for … suspicious reasons (you can sign a Change.org petition here). 

Also: Weaponizing mental health. Car talk. Driving stick shift. Working remotely vs. working in the office. Remembering 9/11 and what became of America (note that we recorded this before the anniversary of 9/11). 

And, from threatening to sue the ADL to siding with Russia, Apartheid Baby continues to be the worst. 

So please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast and @JennandDave1.

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Episode 38: Happy Labor Day!

On this Week’s episode: a rambling conversation about everything from the holiday weekend to running races and training for marathons to … Martha Stewart? 

More importantly, we discuss the Texas Supreme Court’s ill-advised decision that lets the state’s ban on gender-affirming care for minors take effect despite the overwhelming weight of scientific and medical evidence to the contrary. And, on a related note, we talk about how the “parents’ rights” movement isn’t about parents’ rights at all, but interfering with your rights as a parent. We talk about the Canadian doofus who goes by the name “Billboard Chris,” the anti-queer cult’s complete misunderstanding of “consent” in the context of minors’ health care (hint: parents always have to consent to health care for their kids), and the limited (but obvious!) circumstances where parents lose the right to make decisions for their kids.

Finally, a couple of notes: First check out our friend Jesse Jackson’s appearance on the Bella Grayce Podcast where he talks about dealing with family members’ substance abuse and the uniqueness of losing a sibling. Second, we briefly revisit the firing of a local queer teacher over social media posts and the new GoFundMe to support him. Please consider making a donation!

Anyway, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast and @JennandDave1.

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Episode 37: What’s the Matter with Homer Glen?

On this Week’s episode we talk about guitar playing, the Cubs’ playoff chances, and what the heck is going on in south suburban Home Glen, Illinois, where the local school board apparently fired a teacher for exercising their First Amendment rights to free speech and freedom of religion. We discussed this last episode but naïvely thought the school district might do the right thing. They did not. 

So, this week, we brought the heat. 

The short version is this: It’s hard to see any legal rationale for the board’s actions, and it may, in the end, expose the board to litigation … along with the pitchfork-wielding extremist mob that demanded the teacher’s firing in the first place. We’re talking about you, Libs of TikTok, Moms for Liberty, Awake Illinois, and Awake Americans. Maybe you folks ought to lawyer up.

On a related note, since the lynch mob raised the teacher’s apparent interest in Satanism, you might want to educate yourself about that theological perspective. It’s not what you think.

We also discuss the racist Jacksonville shooting and conservatives’ disturbing, if predictable, pattern of using “mental illness” as a shield to protect bigots and mass murderers and sword to demonize marginalized people, especially members of the LGBTQIA+ community. 

And speaking of lawsuits, with the rising wave of hate crimes in America, from the  racist murders in Jacksonville to the homophobic murder of Laura Ann Carlton in California to bomb threats phoned into Illinois libraries, it may be time to subject some of these extremist groups to the SPLC treatment. See: Aryan Nations on the Verge of Collapse Following Judgment.

Finally, since groups like Moms for Liberty got their start protesting COVID restrictions in schools before they turned to attacking trans and nonbinary youth, we thought we’d take a look at the number of COVID deaths versus the number of gender affirming surgeries among kids 18 and under. While it’s difficult to find statistics for exactly identical time periods, you won’t be surprised to learn that there were more than 1,800 COVID deaths among kids from 0 to 18 through June 2023, and around 800 surgeries, nearly all on 17 and 18 year olds, during the the two-year period from 2019 to 2021. So, apparently, Moms for Liberty and their affiliates would rather that children die of COVID than have potentially life-saving surgeries. Duly noted.

Anyway, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast.

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Episode 36: A Hundred Degrees in the Shade

On this Week’s Episode: A heat wave in the midwest. Climate change is real. Growing up without air conditioning. Bomb threats at libraries. Anti-queer hate crimes. And local outrage addicts pick up the pitchforks and go after an art teacher for … being queer? Exercising their First Amendment rights? Criticizing the police? Being a “satanist”? Having had mental health issues several years ago? Who knows, but it doesn’t add up.

Also … a little Irish hip hop for good measure? Why not.

Update on the art teacher controversy: Since recording this episode, the local school district fired the teacher for reasons that are less than clear. We’ll have more information — and more questions — on next week’s episode.

So, anyway, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast.

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Episode 35: A Quieter Podcast … Sort Of

On this Week’s Episode: Haircuts. Heated conversations. Why people feel like they don’t have a platform when there are more platforms than ever. The Clash and the ethos of punk. Bruce in Ireland (again!) and how Little Steven trolled the haters. A chance meeting between Joe Strummer and Bob Weir. RIP and Pee Wee Herman and Tony Bennett. Johnny Cash always got it. And more!

So, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! And follow us on Twitter at @itsotetPodcast.

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Episode 34: Keeping Up With the News

On this Week’s Episode: Trying to keep on top of the news without drowning in a sea of misinformation. Teaching history. The media’s obsession with “cancel culture” and their misunderstanding of censorship. The complexity of free speech in the classroom. The summer is flying by. Our youngest’s senior year in college. Courts learned some good lessons from COVID. And more.

We also remember Shuhada’ Sadaqat, born and known professionally as Sinéad O’Connor, who died unexpectedly last week at age 56. We talk about the tremendous courage it took for her to stand up to the Catholic Church and call out its history of sex abuse and coverups, as well as her honesty and openness in sharing her mental health struggles with the world. And we acknowledge that many of us owe her an apology.

But we also talk about how she found peace later in life in small villages in Ireland where the locals let her be herself. That’s a beautiful thing, even if it didn’t last. What an absolutely tragic loss.

So, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! 

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Episode 33: Mind Your Business

On this week’s show: Our pool is finally open after months of delay. We’re still trying to get the hang of Threads. Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick support the ACLU Drag Defense Fund. Drag queens have First Amendment rights, too. A lot of you have lost your minds. Jennifer says mind your business. “Moms” for “Liberty” doesn’t want this smoke. White people ruined “woke” (just ask Bill Burr). “Awake Americans” … who are awake, but not woke? … are cringeworthy. And more. 

So, please enjoy this week’s episode, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, and, as always, support the rights of LGBTQIA people everywhere! 

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